Did you lose your job, spouse and home due to your WoW addiction? Do you still have a psychological need for loot, but are too proud or too squeamish to give handjobs to random passersby to pay for your monthly subscription fee? Ginormo Sword is for you! This game provides the same dopamine-drip effect of your favorite MMO without any of the cost (or visual payoff). Ginormo is a single-player RPG (you always complained of how much the other players online were blabbering dumb shits, didn't you?) that distills the genre to the bare essentials.
You didn't give a fuck about the story in your last MMO, and the developer thankfully realizes this by removing all text-scrolling from the game. Ginormo is just as succinct with the gameplay; if you found pressing WASD to move and clicking like a spastic chimp a tad too hard to manage don't fret, as Ginormo Sword further simplifies the controls to just the mouse. Combat is equally as minimalistic and thankfully void of challenge; click to attack and don't be careless enough to walk into your enemies to win. Each enemy you kill drops gold, which of course can be used to buy said loot. Slay mobs, get loot, repeat ad infinitum. You're most likely accustomed to this from your days of Pavlovian conditioning in Azeroth. Once you tire of this, wander around your static environment till you stumble upon another spawning ground of enemies. While these motherfuckers got a sprite change, they display the same attack strategy -- namely wander around autonomously until someone dies. These guys have more health, however, so use that gold to buy a new sword (+1 fire damage, bitches!!11 Lolz lewt!) and make fast work of them. Kill all three sets of mobs to open up the "boss" fight. Once you complete this it opens up another screen that (surprise!) is exactly the same in content. In the third section it lets you level up your sword (not you, mind, your sword) which is where the game gets its title. Your once flaccid sword gains girth and length, and now can be slung around with pride.
While there were thirty or so more screens after this, I sure as hell didn't play them. It's a beautiful 67 degrees outside, and I don't feel like spending an arctic summer day indoors. If your homeless ass still need your loot fix by all means play; hang out at a public library and grind to your heart's content. I'm sure it'll last you till you get hooked on to something as self-destructive and pointless, like hardcore drugs or some batshit-crazy cult.
Srsly, this game is in the vein of Upgrade Complete or Achievement Unlocked, and is a great meta-commentary on the whole MMO scene and the shallow and one-dimensional gameplay behind it. Strip away the chatroom and all of the other bells and whistles from your MMO and you're left with Ginormo Sword and its lifeless and hollow gameplay. One of my best friends in my hometown has a sad addiction to WoW; rarely leaving his home, pursuing any academic interests, or frankly living. My only firsthand experience with this genre was some shitty free one a couple years back, where I spent roughly twenty hours to get to a decent level. I accidentally stumbled into a PVP area, got killed quickly, lost my gear, and then got called by some pimply 13 year old a "n00b". After that, I asked myself why the fuck I was wasting my time on this, and started up on another Vonnegut novel. Hopefully grind addicts that play this might have a similar epiphany...instead of wasting hours getting their virtual sword bigger.